Patient longing

Stone sits cold in hot hand

Full of waves of memories

Smooth with tears of sadness

Going back over and over

To waves that could take a different turn

Tearing this heart apart

If only this pebble could be held

To tell a different truth

Today’s joy drowns in sorrows tears

Feathers forgotten not sought

Kept precious like memories in a jar

Of grief walks with heavy heart

Mystery lies over the canopy of trees

Not reached or heard

Even when questions shouted loudly

Or whispered to the trees

Silence in the empty

Moments that are distress

Full of without and yearning

For a different time and place

This mountain will be climbed

By sitting still

Offering tears like jewels

Sorrow with all its sweetness of love

In the hopes that grace will touch lightly

Brushing tears from face

When dusk arrives, there is patient longing

For tomorrow’s hope  

Without

Sinking deep into sadness

Sobs of sorrow hidden

No longer seeking witness to grief

It holds heavy

This broken heart

To never be fixed

Sluggish and slow

Sadness seeps like a river’s mist

Over and over again

Heavy footed

With this burden of loss

Too much mother love

To hold for all these tomorrows

Without

As always

One day turns into another

Light touches beauty of nature

That gives calm and repose

A chance to not dwell on distress for a moment

Thinking to give a name to grief

May call it sadness or sorrow

Yet always wonder at the depth of this love

On the right day at the right time

Seeking deeply into unforgotten love, embracing the memories

The pictures of yesterday’s joy

Breathing deeply held with grace a moment’s peace

Overshadows return with tears and sorrow

Within as of now joy and sorrow sit as companions

Too much mother love has the power to sit still

Or to find opportunity to rejoice at once was held

Touched with deepness of longing

Seeking as always a new way to return home

This love

In the choice to keep going

In the direction that has little map or plan

Yet somehow pushes onwards and outwards to light

Letting out of this dark deep cave of grief

Seeking this weight of grief to one day be less heavy

It has to be made into being more about love than loss

Perhaps moving towards reaching a different place

With different light

Where shadows are longer but light shines brighter

Will bring a lighter step

Chances and choices can be invited in for creation of a new identity

That holds this too much mother love

Surrounded with memories filled with summer flowers of hope than winters dark decay

Hope now an activity to jump towards that great mystery that always holds with grace

Meaning  will be etched on pebbles to  be found on a blue sky day

Joy will wash over sadness without pushing sorrow out  

Smiles will return alongside tears that forever fall

As witness to this grief , this love

High days and low days

Is the sadness that generates fear?

It is not the drowning in sorrow

But the fear that one will swim in these thoughts of deep melancholy forever

Humankind wants to fix with friends wanting to make happy

It seems perhaps it is to just push on through and convince oneself

To expect the unexpected in spirit and grace

The deep friendship between my broken heart and grief holds strong

This dynamic that is all about love held and love lost

Looking back I saw what I have lost

Scared now in the world I now sit

Living in each moment in time

Breathing deeply

Saying over and over I am held I am held

Remembering it is all about hope and mystery   

With all the words

Tiny prayers of love written in gliding pen

With broken hearts and flower and fauna coloured in

Tears come to nourish the sadness

With all the words the loss remains

Gaps given over to whispered words of hope

When sadness stays steady

It is always about love that brings hope for tomorrow

And the pain for today reminds of the deepest of loves

Again and again returning questions that cannot be answered

To the great mystery where all is unknown yet wisdom prevails

Reminders, must try to be kindly on days of little light

Palms gently held open to seek in the mystery of all tomorrows

Touching with grace all that is found in the places one dares to look

Always seeking hope forever in wonder at the great mystery  

Returning to words

Returning to words

Rolling sounds on tongue

Jumbled phrases of coulds in mind

Words of meaning of hope and mystery

Staggering onwards to seek truths

The creation of pain in grief

That is all about loving and remembering

Yet finding away to be free from shame

Some days the wise whispers from the trees

Can embrace with belief a better tomorrow

That there is light and days of smiles

Walking in soundless calm

Breathing deeply into sorrow

Learning to accept that grief is now the closest of friends  

It is better to understand the truth of this

Freedom comes with the honesty of pain

Living with too much mother love

Judged by the amount of loss held

Brings tears and weary days

Calm acceptance of distress

As joy and sorrow intertwine